|If he isn't your brother/friend/ Co-worker already, he will be|
Scientists have unearthed a disturbing, yet comforting, trend as the undeniable truth, can not be denied any longer, that non-essential white males are being systematically replaced by Michael Chernus AKA "The Chernus", "The Generic Angel", "Party Slag"and "Everyman, if Everyman let himself go but had a personality to compensate".
|While his modern incarnation was born in 1977, Chernus like figures have been identified throughout history, always ambiguously middle aged|
Michael Chernus would like you to believe he was born in Rocky River, Ohio AKA Midwest Anytown, on August 8th 1977 AKA the school-less beginning of lazy hot month during the Carter administration, even recounting it gives the reader mild retrograde amnesia, especially due to his special circumstances, primarily that aside from forged documents, photographs and lying witnesses, there is no physical evidence that Michael Chernus existed before 2007, when he turned 30, AKA...middle-aged.
Satyr, which I can prove if people would allow me to strip him down and display his constant erection, or video tape him at his orgies where he will inevitably substitute the word fun with faun, and no he isn't just drunk and slurring his words as he partakes of every earthly pleasure. While surely this mythical thespian of stage and film will toy with mankind, since, isn't that the greatest pleasure this world has to offer? And who better to toy with than middle aged character actors unable to star? It is predicted, by scientists! That Chernus will occupy 95% of the supporting white, middle aged male roles, on stage, in film, married friends, that guy at the bar, and on TV, before his corporeal form disintegrates into a vinegary mist in 2027 as it will have aged past it's prime, only to reconstitute itself in some other non-descript time, in a non-descript place, to wreak non-descript havoc in the future.