7/28/2017

Husks 'R' Us

Do you loath dusty necropolises and crowded graveyards?
[Man comically, catastrophically, sneezes scattering human remains in all directions] [Women begins digging up a grave, but everyone turns and points towards her accusingly]

Husk procurement can be dangerous, difficult, not to mention taboo, so leave it to the professional


But need a husk for legal, recreational, ceremonial, medical, media, productions on stage, film or TV etc. or just to grind up or brew in a soup to give you a boner? We have husks of many species, sapient and primal, in formaldehyde, stuffed, mummified, skeletons and exoskeletons. We have exceptional specimens of husks, average ones, and husks deformed in every way imaginable, from husks that represent that species next step in their evolution, ones that were hunted for being just too different, to husks that begged us to kill them, we have the soulless remnant for you.

Can't choose one husk? Why not try one of our famous husk platters, or ask one of our Husk imagineers to help you build the husk of your dreams



While we do offer a wide variety of undead husks, ones that come with the promise that we charge the same price whether you are related to the husk, or just an aficionado, we also offer the  Husks 'R' Us Guarantee that our inanimate husks will never animate, and we back up that promise with ancient ruins carved into everyone of our husks, whether it is a zombie apocalypse or a vengeful warlock, our husks will never turn against you, that's the Husks 'R' Us difference.

We have adorable husks, you know, for the kids... awe!


So whether you are new to the world of husks, or an Ole'Husky, we have the variety and quality you've come to expect from Husks 'R' Us, the only husk merchant that is certified by the FDA to sell, distribute, appropriate, and produce husk products of every type, including ointments,lubricants, and tinctures, and licensed to sell extraterrestrial husks when captive populations reach a level where they can be treated as livestock. So come on down to a Husks 'R' Us near you, or our VHS catalog brought to you by a guy, who knows a guy.

Come again soon!!!