While the bears are away, the Eskimo's will play


As Polar Bear numbers dwindles, the Eskimo population is poised to explode, just as it was decimated by the little Ice Age between 1400 and 1600, which ended Inuit whale hunting in the high arctic, both due to climate change, and polar bears who you can't prove weren't sentient and malevolent, during that period, you just can't. Honestly, mirror test a 15th century Polar Bear and prove me wrong, but I don't think you have the guts, or time traveling know how to prove me wrong, just to prove me wrong. Even in their current dumbed down form the large ursine carnivore is a sympatric predator of the Eskimo, who find it nearly impossible to compete with the Charismatic Megafauna, as hunters or as a popular symbol of their polar region, but thanks to global warming and resurgent whale populations, the Eskimo's are feeling lucky now that they no longer need to compete with the extremely sexually dimoprhic bears who are always the center of attention at any event they attend.

Tuunraq, keeper of game, hopes you get lucky

Now,as the people of the circumpolar region who live in stilted houses say, " If the stilts are a rocking, don't come a knocking", which used to refer to out of control alcoholism and domestic violence, but it increasingly refers to sex fueled by the total lack of fear that polar bears instill as predators and economic rivals and the warmer ice free temperatures, cause the poorly constructed dwelling to sway.

Have bears and arctic temperatures been the only thing holding the Eskimo's sexual revolution back? Well that's what I told these two Greenland Inuits

Of course, now that Eskimo's are free to spend their endless summer days cavorting in the taiga, unafraid of being attacked by the largest carnivorous predator in the world mid-coitus, or being unable to bring home the blubber because you got chased from your kill by some white @$$hole, will it lead to a boom in the Eskimo population, or will these new found liberties be primarily recreational? Or was it the fear of the Polar Bear that got them in the mood in the first place, that the fact that a 2,000 pound apex predator could choose to make you and your family its meal, at any moment, and there is nothing you could do about it, drove the Eskimo's to cherish life in a way they no longer will, devolving into an internet porn addiction at some point unless those majestic beasts are reintroduced into their lives, or they turn to increasingly niche fetishes.

Nothing like a Polar Bear to spice up your sex life

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