PeanutZ

That night she joined a convent, only to slit her wrists in the bath tub a year later

Major US corporations adopting Kafkaism

On my way to corporate I asked directions but all he said was "Where have they gone, where have they gone, my family, my family".

After making me fill out a series of forms and flow charts that seemed to gauge my class, ethnicity and religion without specifically mentioning them or directly alluding to them, as well as make a series of strange vocalizations, and analyze a series of written works describing violent scenarios. I was led out to an old chemical shed and was told to wait on the floor, despite the many chair stored there, and told to surrender my phone and shoes. After waiting for 3-hours an elderly secretary led me through a narrow hallway, made more ominous by flickering florescence and alternating screams and laughter from the neighboring dentistry practice. I was led into a 10 by 10 foot office with an inexplicable amount of paper cluttering what little space remained. I was beckoned to shoo the office cat from the only remaining chair, but the territorial hissing, and foaming at the mouth made me decide to stand, the disgruntled corporate lobbyist grunted "suit yourself" while obviously taking offense.

All attempts to ask about break room policy were met with obvious agitation, an expansion of his book lungs and the hissing reply " BBBBbbbbrrreak"

Burkes T. Boggat, the man whose office I was awkwardly standing in, further belched " The hot shots back in corporate need X amount of money, we used to be able to trim off Y using old fashioned racism and misogyny, glass ceilings, arbitrary salaries, hiring and firing, just shitty things to do to a person, but it saved money and conformed to long standing prejudices" he said before consuming half a bucket of chicken, throwing the bones to his cat "shitface", while farting loudly and chugging Mountain Dew, before getting back on track. " The trustfund babies and other stockholders ain't giving up [wet fart] X, and we can't reach X without the Y money, but the US taxpayer has us over a barrel as far as making up the saving by systematically denying citizens their basic rights, so we have deny people their basic rights in a manner which defies logic, systematizing , analyzing or correlation, otherwise we get sued, but we still need to make sure our Kafkaesque savings are equal to our bigoted saving, while still providing legal cover to systematically destroy an individual to our advantage [cat wretches yellow frothy, bloody bile and bone shards]". Boggat made several more choking rasping breaths before finishing " So there is nothing you can do about it and our workers will just have to learn to live with the nightmarish and arbitrary, yet colorblind and gender neutral world we have built for them, because what other option do they have bu to run our mazes" before he choked, vomited and died, posthumously voiding his bowels as his cat almost immediately began to feed on the carrion.

They said he, like so many of us, is trapped in the cages of our own mind, of our own making, but I am pretty sure he was just trapped in a literal cage

  

Poo in the snow

Bill Clinton is looking forward to seducing your daughter

Little Rock - While stumping for Hillary with a group of high school girls smoking cigarettes, the former President explained that he desired to provide a variety of sexual experiences to the nations youth, using his fame and wealth to leverage your child into a, seemingly, consensual relationship with a man known for his proclivities whose female captor is other wised engaged. With the White house again within his grasp the former President was heard jubilantly singing the following:

While the teens were flustered and enchanted by his performance, and looking forward to the aforementioned rape, he clarified that he didn't want to forcibly take the daughter of the listeners, but, instead get her to love him through an abduction/quasi Stockholm situation, and went on to show a dramatic rendition of a musical speech he had sung for his kin many years ago, about his desire to abduct and marry your daughter:

So listener, be forewarned

Here the former President can be seen joking about the sex he is going to have with your daughter, with a known rapist