Donut(s) Party

Now that you've had your fill of Donuts, let me tell you about Donut(s) Party...

First rule of Donut(s) Party, we don't tell ANYONE about donuts, why!?! Because it builds anticipation that might not be fulfilled based on the participants behavior, which would in turn lead to unwarranted resentments, because it was YOU who broke the...Second rule of Donut(s) Party, Donut(s) Party is an incentive based social gathering, where good behavior is rewarded, some of the founders of Donut(s) Party believed it should also be where poor behavior is punished as spectacle, but we don't hang out with those people anymore and they are not invited to Donut(s) Party. Third rule of Donut(s) Party, you can have as many donuts as you want, but only one at a time, no picking off frosting or "sucking creme", leaving a sugary untouchable husk of a once proud dessert and expecting us to stand by while you prey on yet another, anyone who tries to do this, will be beaten, stripped, and left by the side of the highway, rhetorically of course, and no matter how angry one is, always politely... Or no donuts. The Fourth rule of Donut(s) Party, is the same basic golden rule most advanced cultures have, whether it be Buddha, Hillel, or Jesus saying it, but we have chosen to go with the "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" version, and ask participants to be excellent to each other, and party on dudes. The fifth rule of Donut(s) Party: We are not affiliated with any religion or political party, but instead promote our own political platform, with all members expected to vote only for Donut(s) Party approved candidates, referendums etc. etc. and while Donut(s) Party does not discriminate against religious backgrounds, we do have a non-negotiable philosophy, many of its precepts are kept secret, both to avoid persecution, the dissemination of Gnostic knowledge to un-believers, who might in turn mock that which they do not understand,and because it will give us something to talk about at future Donut(s) Party's. The sixth and final rule of Donut(s) Party is the belief that time and space are on one celestial millstone, that coincidentally look like two donuts rotating in opposite directions, that purifies the soul into a pure and eternal state through a variety of reincarnations, both human, animal, plant and inanimate, towards the goal of a perfectly refined universe, and that Donut(s) Party is an integral part of that.