Erdogan now front runner for "Hitler of the Year"

Between the amoral consummate party player and the out of control blustering populist id in America, as well as growing xenophobia in the UK, white Anglo's were thought to be a shoe in for "Hitler of the Year" until Erdogan "Coup". Of those who are unaware of the "Hitler of the Year" Award, they are chosen for their: Disregard for democratic institution, the subversion of legal safeguards, as well as about 213 completely secrete and esoteric criteria known only to the Hierarchy, and are in turn used to control the population, and bend them to the popular will.

Tens of thousands of Turkish citizens: School teachers, college professors, police Judges etc. are being detained, raped, tortured, and sever travel restriction have been placed on millions more, after a nebulous, short lived and seemingly harmless Coup on July 15th which seems to have given the President that would be Dictator a Casus Belli against all his enemies,no matter their actual involvement in the coup, after a suspicious incident where the nations parliament was bombed.

Here are what some contenders had to say about this upset:

"Hitler was powerful man, with a beautiful wife, who had the best' guns, the best planes, the best missiles, now am I going to go around killing Jews and Homosexuals, well yeah, but not because they are Jews and Homosexuals, so perhaps I wasn't running for the spot, but I woulda scrapbooked it" Trump said before tipping a wheelchair bound veteran into the crowd below while crying in anger over losing, despite the trivial nature of the award.

Trump went on to promise, if elected, he wouldn't be a Hitler, he would 10 of the best Hitlers, 1933-42 Hitlers, its going to be yuuuge

The Clinton campaign downplayed this slight to her endless lust for power, they chose to play offended "Hillary is an avowed and staunch Stalinist, and as such has a particular antipathy and sensitivity towards Nazism and Hitler in particular " they reported to Pravda, though sources around the former first lady report a considerable uptick in arbitrary summary executions of staff.

While we understand she was angry, she didn't have to do what she did to that intern, on her birthday

MP Boris Johnson was, as of press time, too involved with a maniacal scheme to drive Theresa May insane by sneaking his hyper-sexual feline familiar "Palmerston" into 10 Downing street, forcing the Prime Minister to furiously call the police to eject the protected and famous feline while a barely obscured Johnson giggled from the bushes outside.

While there are still four plus months and a US election before the final tally is in, and Hitler-esque leaders are known for their lighting fast moves, and explosive defeats. Yet, as of late July, there is no leader who has seized so much power, so eroded the independence and power of important institutions, and systematically and brutally crushing all opposition, which is what a leader must do to be "Hitler of the Year".

The DNC would like to remind you how evil all Russians are, always

The DNC and their FBI dogs are "Like totally, 101% sure" Grigori Rasputin is the root of the hacker attack on the DNC

As the DNC got their ass handed to them by a group of anonymous hackers, and their first inclination was to blame the Russians, based on the these correlating facts:
- How the information was inputted, could have been from a Cyrillic keyboard
- The hackers didn't work on Russian holidays
- The Hackers, people with the ability to manipulate electronic data, used IP addresses associated with Russian servers
- Russians are known to be be stone faced maniacs who will do and say anything to get what they want, and they will drown their conscious  in vodka later

A state dept sources who asked not be named for fear of Clinton's "Lurkers in the Shadows" said " The attack was elegant, like a ballerina trained from birth to be perfection in human form and trained by an elderly gymnast, whose own dreams of glory were crushed in a Nazi invasion and the rebuilding of his shattered homeland from the ashes" adding "These hackers are probably the children of disaffected Russian officials and former soviet revolutionaries" before nervously walking, then running, away.

You know this guy was, probably, involved

A DNC spokesman, who insisted I call him Cecil Rodriguez, stated "We would just like to remind the electorate how evil Russians are, the depths of their depravity, and their innate talent for subterfuge, and how it is a part of them, and how their leader, Vladimir Putin, is the worst of the lot" and added, "off the record, even the 'Good Ones' are probably just spies".

Democrats Fudge their convention

Here Debbie Wasserman Shultz can be seen receiving the news of 20,000 leaked emails

As the Democratic front runner had been recovering from her testosterone and crystal meth injections, and for no reason was she to be disturbed, especially using the unspoken medium (E-mails). On the other hand it had just been proven beyond any conceivable doubt that the DNC conspired to push the coronation of Hillary Rodham Clinton, using such tactics as:
  - Jew Baiting
  - Questioning Sanders commitment to his faith during southern primaries
  - Colluding with journalists to promote a favorable image of Clinton, over Sanders
  - Using the DNC to pressure journalists into promoting Hillary Clinton
  - Using the DNC to intimidate journalists who were pro-Sanders or anti-Hillary
And that is just what pertains to the DNC, that has been refined from 20,000 emails delivered just days ago. Some in the DNC have blamed the Russian government, as many in the Clinton campaign believe Trump and Putin are carrying on a torrid love affair over their mutual sexualization of power.

Vodka and Autocratic beliefs make strange bedfellows

Trying to avoid the vengeful Queen of politics, her entourage quickly went looking for a female minority from a swing state to replace Shultz with before anyone noticed and they would be crushed by a figurative rolling ball of media attention as it barrels down the narrow confines of convention coverage. As a result, meet your new ring master, Marcia Fudge

Guess what!? She believes what democrats are supposed to believe and never used the DNC to pick a fight with the nations most popular progressive

 

Caution "F" word

Now that you have been duly warned, I plan to use the word "Fuck" a fucktillion times to describe a futuristic hierarchy based on who you have fucked, who you are fucking, who you could realistically fuck in the future, and who these fuck partners have, are and will fuck. Welcome to the Fuckocracy! You're in the game now.

While eskimo relations have long been part of all human societies, as more and more functions can be done by machines or destitute nations, and instead of any productive per suite, your place in society will be decided by a psychosexualmentaculis our brains have yet to evolve  into, in order to preform such sexual math, and even they will need a vast and complex VR AI system to keep track of it all, and while our fucking will be looked back upon as some pastoral golden age of romantic and naturalistic fucking, we can not comprehend the all encompassing fuck we will give and receive thousands of years from now, and how each act of genital contact, for better or for worse, will be immortalized forever, or as they will refer to it , your "Fuck-life" as it pertains to "The circle of fucks".

While there is a class of socially dead "Fuckless Ones", who never fuck, and thus are not part of general society, but instead live off the " Fucktithe", which is a stamp tax for every recorded act of intentional genital contact, and to fail to record such contact is illegal, taboo, and inadvisable considering how much employers frown upon gaps in your FuckCV, or lose the social modifiers for most regional fucks for a certain quadrant. These Fuckless Ones, comprising about 1-2% of the population maintain all essential non-fuck related infrastructure, and tend to live rich, honest and fulfilling lives, though they are pitied by the fucking masses.

To maintain the quality and integrity of the fuck, fuck rehearsals are not uncommon

The fuck related infrastructure is maintained by those practicing procreative monogamous sex, The Families,which itself is considered something entirely different than the births among the general population that only occur after .001% of fucks, due to cheap but somewhat ineffective birth control, considering the number of fucks occurring on any given day, with these births accounting for 85% of total births, but almost all of them are then fostered by Families, as a life of constant fuck-traps, or what we would call romance, is no place for a child. These children are raised till adolescents, when the parents will return to mentor the teen in the ways of the fuck, as a lineal connection, and past and resulting fucks will have a direct impact on their societal fuckscore for as long as their line shall live.

Many humans have returned to the oceans, preferring the 3- Dimensional fuckscape it provides

Now, to your simplistic puritan mind this world sounds base and culture-less, and I won't shoot back "It would be with the way you fuck", because it would make you sad, and kindly put, your sexual imagination is like comparing a gnat to dolphin, both in size, ingenuity, ability to use tools, playing, and having sex hundreds of times in a day, the poverty of that comparison is almost as vast as of that, of you, having sex with anybody in the entire world, under any circumstance, and the fuck that any member of the fuckocracy could provide to any member, at any time.

The fuck has become the cumulative artistic endeavor of the majority of the population, lacking anything better to do, for millennia, after millennia, becoming the greatest and most human artistic experience to ever occur, for thousands of years, drawing human and alien time travelers from across the cosmos for that 20,000 years of hyper-animated bliss, making the multigenerational tapestry of fucks all the more exotic and dazzling, and presided over our fucking, nodding and salivating Old Ones, gnashing and bellowing as they flare with their eyestalks at all that man was doing, heavens afire in terrifying displays which egged the populace on to greater acts of hedonistic play acting, sexual sculpting, and hyper-realistic holographic depictions of acts preformed in an artistic and spiritual flowering the likes of which the universe had never seen before, and never recovered from.

When you fuck the wind, be ready to birth a fuckstorm, as they once said

As anything that could flee to that time and place did so, creating a temporal void lasting thousands of years, rending the universe in temporal and spatial taters, and the few habitable pockets looked at procreation as the cause of all their misfortune and the natural process was forbidden by all species for millions of years, each generation being born artificially and in pain, taking millions of more years to finally recover from "The Great Fuckocalypse".