Breaking News: The Emperor KNEW he had no cloths!!!!

If the child hadn't ended it, who knows how far it would have gone

As the Inspector General gave the orders to the assembled masked riders and all the church bells chimed at midnight a grand pogrom across the kingdom began. This episode began several weeks earlier when a transient charlatan tried to pass himself off as a fashionable merchant intent on fleecing the Emperor, being so bold as to think that he could convince the Emperor that no cloths, were the latest fashion. The bemused Emperor decided to play along as his grandfather Hansel the First had when captured by a cannibalistic witch, who he eventually burnt alive, and thought it amusing to show his "Shield and Lance" to the assembled lords and notables, appreciating the freedom his position often denied him. Unfortunately for the assembled crowd, the Emperor was also taking a mental inventory of everyone's reaction to what should have been considered a terrible embarrassment, though obviously not to one-self confident potentate, and deciding then and there who could be trusted... and who could not. Originally planning to tour his castle and the local village in his "New Cloths" as well, before a child called his bluff, and he played the befuddled and embarrassed fool, thoughts of vengeance already dancing in his head. While most thought his absence from public appearance was a matter of embarrassment, it was actually when he secretly marshaled those loyal to him, and planned how to divvy the spoils of those who were not. As for the "Fashionable Merchant", well, the Emperor had to get the leather for his new cloths somewhere...

A Roman slave had a life expectancy of 17.9 years

Did you know there are upwards of 10 million Jews in America today, yet Romanesque Architecture is still widely used 

Did you know that almost all materials in all American schools about the Roman Empire, despite the Roman's enslaving  and exploiting countless millions, are overwhelming positive! Despite the fact that their "culture" was just a mimetic hodgepodge of other more authentic Mediterranean cultures, built on a foundation of rape, terror and military dominance that only started to look pretty after it raped, terrorized and enslaved better civilizations and then demanded their slaves teach them all their cool ideas, before doing any manner of unspeakable, or perfectly ordinary, things to them.

Uncle Tom's Jew, a popular Roman myth propagated to roman-ticize one of their many atrocities 

In addition to remaining Roman Monumental architecture, the Roman Church, and latin language & culture forming the basis of Western  European culture, we have to root out it's corrosive, morally-bankrupt, rape culture ( Please click so you can see just how pervasive the problem is), as they were also a culture that was entirely built on slavery, that imploded when its supply of slaves dried up. If the Confederacy was evil for its peculiar institution, the unabashed domination of the Roman slave culture, that was found in every facet of Roman life, means it should be sandblasted from the cultural and historical record except as some vague cautionary tale.

The Federal Style popularized in the United States is basically a cheap Roman rip-off, so is it any wonder that slaves built parts of it? Burn Palladian architecture to the ground so we can be free!

Yet, despite all their moral failings, their bankrupt culture, and despicable actions, Western Civilizations continue to teach that Rome was an integral part of our civilization, that different times create different moral realities, that for better or for worse historical gravity warps our reality whether we recognize it or not, that it just needs context not excision, should we listen? Or instead do what feels good, topple the statues, torch the buildings, melt down the idols, put its priests and scholars in chains, reduce them to poverty, and carry the women folk away as spoils, because that's what the Romans would do.

Scandinavian submarine murder, what you need to know

While most people like to claim that Submarines history began somewhere between the the late 18th and 19th century, in truth, like North American colonization, it began in the 8th century by vikings. plying the seas in their Koskind-boble, trading, hunting, and of course murdering people, especially balladeers who got in their way. The proud tradition of private submarine ownership and operation, though unknown to non-vikings/Scandinavians, is a secret brotherhood of ancient submariners whose greatest sacrosanct truth is that loose lips sink ships, and that lye pickled Greenland shark is just about the most wonderful thing you've ever heard about a human putting in their mouth, the beloved Kaestur Hakarl, making up an obscene portion of these Odin worshiping, under-sea exploring, paranoid murderers of the Baltic and North Atlantic's diet.

What started as a love for mildly toxic shark meat, led to a murderous obsession

90% of Submarine Murder investigators, and 70% dolphins trying to pass as humans agree, Scandinavian Submarine murders are woefully under-reported, and generally attributed to "The Kraken", which is also the call sign for a Ham-Radio Operator on a pirate submarine operating off the coast of Iceland, who spends his winters murdering loud people, and snowmobile operators. Like whale songs their ghostly chorus's of "It's a Long Way to Tipperary" can be heard from thousands of miles away, but any one of them whoever speaks of it is dismembered and jettisoned.

It is more of a metaphor than a practical device

While most people would like to believe submarines where built with noble intention, to better understand dolphins, and perhaps sell them textiles, but thanks to German intervention the 1000-year arc of Scandinavian Submarine development, so much of it secret and unknown to anyone, and of course the Germans focused on the murder aspect of it (Yes, Americans had built submarines, but they where whimsical machines of martial folly, not tools of mass destruction) and from 1914 till now, that is what it is best known for, like how the Secret Service is supposed to be all about combating fraud and counterfeiting, but instead wastes all their resources on protecting famous and influential politicians, the primary use of the Submarine became state sponsored murder!

Now, as Peter Madsen, a name I would have chosen if I was inventing a pale methodical murderer from a North Atlantic nation, has murdered a journalist on his submarine, and now the world cares. Perhaps now the world will finally look at the "Non-Existent" world of privately, psychopath, owned submarines roving the North Atlantic... and occasionally the Mediterranean.

Bannon Out! Zionist, Muslim, terrorists obviously to blame

Stephen "KKK" Bannon has done for the Republican Party what Michael Moore would have done for the Democratic party, if Hillary Clinton had appointed him to be her chief strategist, creating pure oratorical bile in his partisan cauldron as he cackles nonsensical talking points and rhetorical puss. Unfortunately for the Republican party, they won the Presidency, and missed out on being able to confront Hillary Clinton, in the national spotlight, for four whole years, imagine the fun they could have had,  since everyone hates her. Of course the most endearing aspect of the Trump Presidency is his Alt-Right proclivities that are giving Mitch McConnell face palm tan-lines, and the whimsical goblin king of them all was the "Bannonator!"as he insisted certain staffers called him, while he insisted others "Never @#$%en look at me! Eyes down before I throw my coffee at them!". He would come in every day smelling of cheap scotch and car-airfresheners that he rubbed on himself to cover up the smell of scotch, and what he hoped was his own piss, ready to do his job, shout racial and religious invectives, and let anything in a skirt know that they are "too pretty to work in a place like this" while smacking and licking his scotch encrusted lips, and scratching himself.

"Daddy likes num-nums"

How could such a perfect creature, just magical, a dream come true, the alt-right  messiah, so how could he be gone, especially if Trump is also a perfect alt-right messiah? It is an Alt-Right mystery! The answer of course is that a Muslim-Zionist terrorist plot targeting "Action Bannon" has been underway for centuries, he postulates from a storage locker with a wrecked couch, scattered scotch empties, and a piss jug, which he referred to as his "Man-Shack". This conspiracy is also responsible for cock-blocking him, making him late for work, and spilling scotch on him right before important meetings and family events, he said while striping down to his soiled undergarments to "Let the wind do its work", while regularly passing gas. The Afro-Zionist Jihadis not only poisoned the mind of the President, made his scotch disappear while he is "Sleeping", and convinced every women he has ever loved to leave him, they also abduct young innocent Christians for their blood, which fuels their powers. At that point, deep in the "Scotch Fever", and waving a firearm, a sobbing Bannon made this reporter promise to tell his tale, before crawling up on his couch to work through the onset of a scotch induced coma, and of course, shitting himself.