Sanders suggests the nominee be chosen by hot dog eating contest

While he would like to win the nomination by eating more hot dogs than Mrs. Clinton, he is also, pretty, pretty, pretty good at log rolling 

Sanders, feeling the Bern of losing, has suggested a range of contests that he excels at and which give him a high probability of winning the nomination. Political analysts cite his failure to win electorally as the key motivator for this shift in strategy, they also think that he is focusing on eating contest after the media broke stories of gastrointestinal distress, which are heartbreaking and grotesque, for both Trump and Clinton . Other analysts believe he is trying to woo super-delegates with a display raw power, equal to, but different than that of getting more than 50% of Democratic voters to decide they want you to represent them in office, also putting forth such ideas as who can hold their breath longer, who knows more presidential trivia, and an open invitation to punch him in the gut, as long as you don't hold back..Others feel that all other contests are just a way of obfuscating his true hearts desire, the hot dog eating contest. As we reported not to long ago, Sanders was nearly killed by an evil folk creature, who happened to be a 6 foot tall hot dog comedian, and this might be his way to show the world he does not live in fear. Whatever the reason, no one is going for it and it just looks sad, and hopeful, idealistic and plucky, but not winning, not that.